Thursday, September 20, 2018

Day 29-NSV

9.17.18 Day 29



I hate weighing myself. I detest the numbers on the scale, the crazy thoughts that go through my head when I step on it... like "If i take a poop I will weigh less." or "If it is up an ounce I am a complete failure and I am just going to throw in the towel." A weekly weigh-in does not motivate me...it has the opposite effect, it fills me with dread, makes me self conscious, gives me anxiety and rips apart any belief I had in myself. 

How can one device do that? Why do I let it have so much power?

When I start a new weight loss plan, diet, "lifestyle change" I am super jacked up in the beginning. I will weigh myself every day and it has a short term motivating effect...but after a few weeks it turns to dread and i start to jump on the scale a couple times a week and those feelings of remorse, worry, despair start creeping in my head and then I go into this "eff it" phase where I don't want to weigh myself, I start slacking on my documentation of my food, perhaps make more bad decisions until I am not losing anything and I look back and think, "what the hell am i doing to myself?" 

I'm on Day 29. I'm to the point where I don't want to weigh myself. I detest that crappy little scale and I shouldn't be like that. Its not the scales fault. He is just doing his job. This angst and dread is all coming from me because I am placing my success at getting healthy on 3 numbers that pop up on the scale. And that is a bunch of bullshit. 

We have to look at our life and say to ourselves, "I am not defined by a number." If we were then we would have a sign on our back with our weight listed so everyone can see it. Losing weight to fit in a pair of pants is great, but it should not be our goal. Better health, lower your risk of heart disease, diabetes, better blood pressure, your joints will feel better, your mobility will increase, your breathing will get better, you may be able to get off your medications...YOUR QUALITY OF LIFE WILL IMPROVE. These are what we should be using to quantify our success...not just the scale.

SPT talks about these types of victories..they are called NSV (non-scale victories) and at first I was like "whatever, i'm all about the digits, yo!" but the real success is being able to walk up a flight of stairs without gasping for air...finding out that you no longer need to take a medication..your blood sugar is within normal range...those are good goals to have. 

So I am only weighing myself once a month. I'm am not going to focus on losing 10 lbs...if I keep following the plan it will happen. For some it may happen very quickly, for some who have PCOS, it may take a little longer, but it will happen. And along the way we will celebrate those NSV because they are worth it!


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